The most celebrated and dreaded four words I could hear today…

“Your Cookies are Here”….as in Girl Scout cookies….as in oh so delicious chocolatey and mint morsels that will undoubtedly lead to expansion of the waistline….so you can imagine the excitement and then the instant dread as I realize how hard I have been working to make some progress with the weightloss business. But I can handle this right? sure I can. First step is to not claim them until tomorrow. I didn’t bring any cash or a checkbook. So rather than make a special trip out at lunch…right now…I am going to write this blog post and get cash tonight to bring in tomorrow. I am giving myself a cooling off period if you will. Time to gather my wits about me and devise a plan….so step one is not obtaining the cookies until tomorrow. Step two: DO NOT open the cookies! Not even for “just one” little cookie that “wouldn’t hurt anyone”. No definitely do not open the boxes. Step 3: Place the boxes of cookies in a opaque bag of some sorts and lock them in your desk drawer until the end of the day. It might be a good idea to hand the key to the office manager and say “don’t give me this until 5:00pm!”. At 5:00pm retrieve the bag full of “items” convince yourself that they are boxes of frozen, mushy spinach, ewww! See you’re going to make it! That was Step 4. Step 5: get home as quickly as you can. Try to avoid anyone you know who might ask you what is in your bag. If asked your response should be “boxes of frozen, mushy spinach, gross!”. Best to reinforce the lies you have told yourself to get this far. No sense in taking any chances here. Step 6: once in the door immediately throw the cookies, in the bag if you have to, into the freezer….probably best to put them in the freezer out in hubby’s garage…no wait, will he eat them if they are out there?……hmmm this might be a chance you have to take. Step 7: walk away. Compose yourself. Take a few more days to get over the idea that there are frozen cookies just a few feet away from your mouth at all times. Once you have mastered the control to avoid the cookies, open a box and have one cookie. Then repeat Step 7. At this rate, the boxes of cookies might last a whole year!….who am I kidding these cookies don’t have a chance with me. If they make it home they would be the luckiest cookies in the world…..assuming what constitutes a lucky cookie is a long survival period. We shall see though, we shall see.

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