You all remember my last fail? Well last night I had another one. I was trimming my toenails (girlie pass) and with my face that near my knee I was able to see a rather long hair on the side of my leg. Wait a sec, that doesn’t belong there, I shaved two minutes ago! Which was the truth because I had just finished my shower. It wasn’t a figment of my imagination though, there was definitely a 1/4 to1/2″ long hair on the side of my thigh. And it was attached…yes I checked to make sure. I was about to just reach into the shower and grab my razor to remedy this attrocity, when I happened to lean over even more to check underneath. HOLY SHIT! There wasn’t just one hair that was left unshaven. A whole colony of those bastards escaped me. And although I tend to remember to shave about as often as I remember to eat vegetables (so about three days a week), this didn’t look like a day or two of neglect. This was at least a month of missing the same area. I decided to jump back in the shower and focus my full attention on this issue.
As I was carefully making sure to get every one of those suckers, my mind started to wander how did this happen? I started to mentally run through my shaving ritual. Lather up the puffy thingy, put right leg on shower ledge, lather up right leg…..that’s it! I realized that the bottom part of my upper left thigh is the absolute last spot that I shave, every time. I obviously get lazy by the end and just spot shave my whole left leg basically. To be fair to myself (read: make excuses for my lazy ass) let’s look at this mathematically. My inseam is 36″ and my out-seam? is at least six inches higher. So let’s average that, 39 inches. I would guestimate the average dimension around my leg is somewhere between 16-20 inches. So let’s call it 18 inches. So we’re talking about a surface area of 702 square inches per leg. That is 1404 square inches for both legs. My razor is only like an inch and a half wide and that is about where the math problem ends. I am not solving some sort of world issue with my math, but that is a lot of area to cover for that little razor. Even if it is a four blade power house, considering the overall area and factoring in the fact that special care has to be taken around the knees and ankles, it makes perfect sense that I missed almost half of my upper left leg. Plus it was in the back. So who really see it anyway?…..oh my husband…hmmm good thing he is blind without his contacts. Anyway this would be the official Girlie Fail numero dos.