Wow THIS is Embarrassing

So when I tell you this…..this deep dark secret…you are probably going to be like ‘Um Natalie, you have told us all about your vajay and some seriously embarrassing situations’ and you are going to think it is hilarious that on a scale of 1-10 this is Waaaaayyy more embarrassing than those things combined…..okay…deep breath…here goes:

As a teenager I was a big nerd for a certain band. A very very very embarrassing band to be a big nerd for…..ugh I can’t even say it. Let’s just say it consisted of three brothers and when they started the youngest was like 10….and that is all I will tell you! No! You can’t torture it out of me!

I had a group of close girlfriends, which consisted of my BFF, her little sister and just a regular FF….not a BFF, but a forever friend…ironically none of us see each other anymore…..did anyone else just realize BFF doesn’t actually mean what we thought it meant? Wipe the tears and let’s move on. Anyway the four of us were obsessed!….well maybe obsessed would entail like stalking and trying to keep their discarded water bottles or something? So I guess one step down from that.

We would all hang out and daydream about the day we would all marry one of the brothers and become actual sisters….my BFF’s little sister didn’t get one, we didn’t tell her that, we just KNEW she was going to be the one left out…..we told her we’d figure something out, she could be a second wife or something. Aren’t we nice?

Anyway….this story gets worse. Like really REALLY worse! Okay you ready? So I didn’t exactly have a job at 13 years old and I wanted to do something special for my BFF for her birthday. So what did I do? I wrote her a book……a book about her future life with a certain person….OH GOD!!!! I can’t believe I just told you that….OH GAWD IT GETS WORSE!!!! It wasn’t just a book about her… was a book about all of us…..beegesus someone just shoot me now. She loved it so much that she asked me to write her MORE…..the story kept going. I can’t remember how many “chapters” there were by the time we were finished. Let’s just all thank the universe that technology has moved WAYYYY too fast and that the little plastic discs that I saved this “book” on became so obsolete that they ended up in the trash a few years later….WHEW!

So why am I telling you this? I mean technically I could have never told a soul, ever, and no one would be the wiser…well besides my BFF, who I hope has forgotten the whole ordeal and destroyed the printed versions of said “book”. This deep dark secret of mine popped up in my brain when I was reading some comments about Jack White following his concert.

More than one girl professed her undying love for him and proposed marriage and it got me thinking ‘oh god! I was that girl’. I mean at one point in my life, that was me. Sure I was 13, so obviously hopped up on raging hormones and too shy and embarrassed from my acne to ever actually write something like that on the intranetz, but still….I feel so much embarrassment for myself and for these girls. But at the same time I understand it. I remember what that felt like. I remember the excitement and fun we had daydreaming…..thinking it was actually possible.

So that gets me to thinking, what would my reaction be now, if I should run into one of my childhood crushes from almost two decades ago? Would I turn back into that girl? Would I be able to be like ‘um who are you again?’ and act all suave and cool? Or would I not be able to resist jumping up and down and hyperventilating as I say ‘OMG….OMG it’s you!….OMG’.

Haven’t we all thought about it? What it would be like to meet that famous person we all admire/crush on/whatever? Would we be able to act cool or would we have lost that game hours before it started?


6 thoughts on “Wow THIS is Embarrassing

  1. You know what’s even more embarrassing than a boy band comprised of three brother…NKOTB. Yeah, that was me. I didn’t just have their posters in my room, I had them framed. But you know what’s even more embarrassing than even that? The fact that to this day I know every lyric to their Christmas tape (yes tape, CD’s weren’t even around then) AND I sing it every Christmas. Out Loud. With people around. Really, I have no shame.

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