The best way to spend the weekend before you quit your job is definitely lounging around and doing a whole lot of nothing. It really helps you to focus on your life and think about what you really want.
So what do I want? I want more love. More love with Andy, Jack and my friends….not like all together though, I didn’t spend the weekend deciding to start a polygamist colony. So you can now sigh with relief.
But I obviously want more love of life in general. I want to love my job, I want to love getting up at the ass crack of dawn (because FYI I am not a morning person), I want to love it all.
Granted I know I will not love every aspect of every day of my life, but I want to get as close as effing possible.
And so these last few days at work are not as sad as I worried they would be. Instead I am excited….excited to grab life by the balls (assuming life has balls) and go get it.
Yesterday I packed 5 years of my life into 2 boxes. It was the strangest thing to think that 5 whole years could be boiled down to just this. I had half a mind to just chuck those two boxes into a dumpster on my way to the car, but….there is still a piece of me in there. Even though it feels like I am starting fresh and really doing what I wished I had been able to do back in 2008, I can’t just discount the journey that got me here.
I will never regret the things I learned, the people I met, and the places I was able to go as a result of this job. How could someone ever regret adding people and experiences to their life portfolio? Well I couldn’t.
Conversely I thought about taking more, keeping more, keeping it all actually. But then what? Am I going to sit at home and go through every piece of paper, every drawing, every report that I ever wrote? No. We must keep pieces of the past (even if just in our memory) but we must not dwell on them too heavily.
Circumstantially, I found out about an amazing conference coming up and it just so happens that the call for abstracts is due in plenty of time for me to get one together. And even more perfect? One of the suggested topics is something I have spent a good portion of my academic career researching, writing, and inspired by. So this bitch is going for it!
I am diving in – feet first! Let’s do this!